Minka Kelly Has a Weird Chin

That's it. I'm done. No more straight forward reviews. Just from the head, baby. And we begin with the atrocity we see in The Roommate. What the fuck? Why take a story line from 1992's Single White Female, or (for my peers) 1996's The Cable Guy and completely shit all over it? This movie had one good thing going for it. Good looks. Minka Kelly is probably the world's most attractive woman (Kristen Bell is right up there with her). But come on, this was horrible.





The story completely went back and forth with nonsense. Get out of here. Leighton Meester is not very good looking, which made the movie worse. There was no gore, no laughs, and worst of all, no boobs. In a movie like this, it's expected to see at least one boob. College freshmen dating frat guys? It just screams boobies! Please give me some boob. Anyway, the movie was terrible, did I mention that? My thesaurus just yelled at me for trying to find more synonyms for awful.

Abysmal? Demolishing? Tantric? Nope, not it.

One lesbian kissing scene, but the two girls involved weren't attractive. I wonder if Derek Jeter would have objected to Minka Kelly making out with a chick. Because that would be superb. The velocity of the script brought me to a snail's pace. Constantly squirming and shooshing the 4 year old (no exaggeration) sitting behind me talking to his overweight grandmother. You want to talk? Go to the fucking diner. At least there the grandma can get cheese fries while trying to justify a false life of annoying family values.

Minka Kelly is hot. Not just hot, but gorgeous. She does have this weird chin dimple thing, but I think that might add to her attractive nature. Who knows? Her looks were the only positive in a really shitty movie. Billy Zane played a creepy professor, but all I could think about was the heart of the ocean. Stick to Titanic brother. The horrendously flawed acting and plot line bring me to the point of absolute pain. Thank God I saw it for free. Horray Free Movie Tuesdays.

Rating: Terrible